Tag: sober houses in massachusetts

Sober Woman Exercising Boston Massachusetts

How Do I Stay Sober?

For people who have recognized that they are suffering from an addiction, one of the first questions they may have is to ask for advice on how to remain sober. Fortunately, there is a lot of help out there for someone who is going through the addiction recovery process.

Focus on Your Health

One of the ways that someone can work on maintaining sobriety is by getting and staying healthy. As you recover from addiction, it is crucial to focus on your health by eating nutritious and well-balanced meals. It is also important to start exercising, which has many physical health benefits. Exercise also releases endorphins and helps with developing mental clarity. Being physically active also helps you to restore a sense of balance in your life, which is important at this stage of recovery.

Make Necessary Life Changes

Another way to help maintain your sobriety is to make certain necessary changes in your life to better facilitate recovery. It is often necessary to cut ties with individuals who helped to encourage your addiction or anyone that is negatively impacting your life. It does not mean that you need to end these relationships forever—but it is often helpful to take a step back from these relationships and focus on your relationships with people who are helping you maintain your sobriety.

An additional necessary life change is to avoid the locations where you used to partake in your addiction. For example, if you are recovering from an addiction to alcohol, you will probably want to avoid going out to bars or other locations where alcohol is present, and people around you will be drinking.

Develop a Structured Lifestyle

Incorporating more structure into your life is a good way to help stay sober. One way to include more structure in your life is to consider a sober living home, which provides structure for its residents. Contact us today to learn more about the structure that the Tharros House provides.

addiction compassion calligraphy

How to Be Compassionate to Your Addiction

Addiction to alcohol or drugs can be a difficult thing for a person to go through. The addiction also tends to negatively impact the lives of family and loved ones. Compassion is an important virtue to have whether you are the one suffering from the addiction and needing to understand how your actions have impacted others, or whether you are watching someone you love fight an addiction.

How Compassion Can Help Someone with an Addiction

There is a difference between enabling an addict and showing them compassion. One way to be compassionate toward someone suffering from addiction is to try to understand what is going on in their mind. Open the door to have a true and deep conversation, and you will both learn more about each other. This can also help repair your relationship if it has been harmed throughout their addiction.

Having Compassion for Your Own Addiction

If you are the one suffering from the addiction, it is important to remember to have compassion for yourself. You may think negative thoughts as you become sober, especially if there were people that you hurt during the time you were suffering from your addiction. You may feel like it is impossible to build your life back together. Remember to have compassion for yourself and to forgive yourself for any mistakes that you made along the way. Keep in mind that there will be opportunities to mend any fractured relationships with others down the road once you have advanced in your recovery. It is important to forgive yourself and to focus on moving forward in a positive way.

If you or a loved one is struggling with a substance abuse addiction of any kind, it is important to seek help as soon as possible. The Tharros House is a sober living home for men located in the Lexington, Massachusetts area. The living facility offers structure and regular meetings to help their residents remain dedicated to their sobriety. Contact us today to learn more about the Tharros House and whether it may be the right choice for you.

Mindfulness for Addiction Recovery Boston Massachusetts

Mindfulness and Addiction

Mindfulness is generally understood as a state of mental focus and awareness that is used in meditation practices. More recently, it has become a popular aspect of cognitive behavioral therapy and has been used to help with addiction recovery.

What Exactly is Mindfulness?

When you are practicing mindfulness, you become aware of your inner self and your external surroundings. While engaged in mindfulness, you are focused on your responses to things that are going on around you in that present moment. The main goal of mindfulness is for you to become aware of your surroundings and feelings without getting attached to what you are experiencing in the moment.

Mindfulness itself is not difficult; however, it does require some self-discipline. When practicing mindfulness, it is important to bring your focus only to what is presently happening around you.

How Can Mindfulness Help with Addiction Recovery?

While mindfulness seems like a simple concept, it does require focus. It can help people who are working on recovery from addiction because it forces them to slow down and achieve a sense of tranquility and calmness. As you practice mindfulness during your recovery, you will be able to appreciate things that you did not notice before while engaging in substance abuse. When you allow yourself to slow down and take in the wonderful experiences that life has to offer to all of your senses, it can help you want to stop seeking out pleasure through your past addictive behaviors.

Mindfulness can also help you with recovery in that it can make you more aware of your reactions to what is happening around you. When you become more aware of this, you can start to better understand your own feelings and your own mind. This can help you stay in control of your mind moving forward and be less likely to return to substance abuse.

Another way you can work through the recovery process is to live in a sober living home. At Tharros House, we offer our residents many benefits as they work through recovery. Contact us today to learn more.

Sober house road to recovery in Boston Massachusetts

Sober Living Residences and Half-Way Homes

When a person is working on recovery from addiction, it can be extremely helpful for them to live in a sober living facility or a half-way home to aid in their recovery.  Living in a drug-free and stable environment can help eliminate certain factors that can be detrimental to maintaining recovery.

Some of the earliest forms of sober living residences were run by religious institutions, such as the Salvation Army and also the YMCA.  These sober living homes were first formed in the 1830s.  In Los Angeles following World War II, “Twelfth Step” houses emerged to help combat alcohol-related issues that had become more widespread during that time period.

Maintaining Sobriety While Living in a Sober Living Residence

Exercise at least three times per week – Exercising can be helpful not only to help your body stay in shape physically but also can help you mentally.  While you exercise, your body releases endorphins which can help to elevate your mood.

Maintain a healthy diet – Eating healthy foods and keeping a regular meal schedule of eating three times a day will help you with your overall health levels.  Falling into unhealthy eating habits can lead to relapsing, hurting your recovery progress.

Attend a 12 Step Program and get a sponsor – A 12-step program is an addiction recovery support group.  These groups often have meetings every day.  A sponsor is a mentor who can help someone recovering from addiction.  Often, a sponsor has already gone through many of the same issues that someone new to the recovery process is currently experiencing, which makes a sponsor a very helpful resource.

Sober living residences, like the Tharros House, can be a helpful place to begin your recovery process.  Living with others who are going through the same things can be a helpful built-in support group.

Sober Living Home Fence in Boston Massachusetts

Sober Living Homes

For those suffering from addiction, sober living homes can be helpful when trying to maintain abstinence from drugs and alcohol.  A stable and drug-free environment is important for continued recovery from addiction.

Sober Living House Expectations

While there are different types of sober living home arrangements, there are some general expectations that apply to sober living houses.  These include:

-No stealing from the house

-Paying fees/dues on time

-No drinking alcohol

-No taking drugs

-No sexual activity with other residents

-No violent actions

Tips for Staying Sober in a Sober Living Residence

  • Attend a 12-Step Program – A 12-step program is a support group for people working to overcome addiction.  There are meetings every day that you can attend as needed.  Many people in the support group have experienced similar circumstances and can offer guidance on how they overcame their own personal setbacks on their path to recovery.
  • Exercise Three Times a Week – Exercising releases endorphins, which make you feel good and elevate your mood.  Exercise can also help reduce compulsive behaviors.
  • Eat Three Meals a Day – Eating healthy foods on a regular schedule is an important part of your overall health.  A person dealing with substance abuse is more likely to relapse if they also have unhealthy eating habits.
  • Get a Sponsor and Contact Them When Needed – A sponsor is a mentor for someone recovering from addiction.  A sponsor is usually at a point in their own recovery where they have already worked through many of the issues that someone newly dealing with addiction recovery is experiencing, so they can be a helpful resource.

While in the process of recovering from addiction, it is important to set goals for yourself and come up with a long-term recovery plan.  Living in a sober living residence, such as the Tharros House can help you progress with recovery from your addiction.

Living a Sober Life in Massachusetts

Living the Good, Sober Life

Stick around people in recovery long enough, and you’ll hear a common message: Sober is better.  In Boston, it sounds more like Sobah is Bettah!  But there’s a reason for the statement, however you pronounce it- for those who stay sober and get recovery, life gets really good!

Road to a better life:

Let’s be clear.  Not many people wake up one day, decide to stop using substances for no reason, and then find that life is better without them.  Usually, there is a reason to stop.  What worked for us at one time, has stopped working.  So we’re willing to try something different.  Some of us engage treatment, a sober community or sober housing.  We look for ways to engage sober support to help us stay sober while working on our recovery.  Yes, most of us had to find sobriety, in order to find recovery.  Sober recovery led us to a life where we felt better, found joy, and discovered, sober is better!

What is sober recovery?

Sober recovery is more than abstinence from alcohol and drugs.  Recovery is about changing the way we engage in life, looking at what’s important to us, and taking action to build a life we want to live without substances.  Stopping your coping mechanisms (drinking/drugs) and taking no further action isn’t likely going to give you much recovery.  If you like white knuckles, this is your path!  To get more, we do more.

What is the sober way?

Finding your path to a life of recovery isn’t easy.  But it’s worth it, and you can do it!  Most of us find it important to build a sober network, surround ourselves with a sober community, and engage sober support, like a sober coach or a sober house.  At Tharros, we’ve combined community with aftercare, and our house offers a safe place to explore sober meaning.  We focus on recovery, with you choosing the fellowship and resources that speak with you.  Our team has many different experiences in recovery, and we make many suggestions, while following a framework designed to help each person move toward a full and meaningful life.  We help you build a life you want to live!

We involve sober entertainment, sober games, sober jobs, and sober dating too!  Living life in recovery doesn’t mean giving up what’s important to you; to the contrary, it’s about finding what’s important to you, building it, and living life in a way that’s meaningful to you!  For those of us on that path, it’s easy to say, Sobah is Bettah!

To learn more about Tharros House and our approach to recovery, visit https://tharroshouse.com/about-2/ or read more of our blog posts at https://tharroshouse.com/blog/

 

Sober roommates on computer in Boston Massachusetts

The Necessity of Sober Community in Recovery

(Sober Roommates and Successful Sobriety)

Contributed by a client of Tharros, 4 months into his stay (December 2016)

Where addiction takes us

As people in recovery from addiction, time and time again, we hear harrowing stories of desperation, loss, and spiritual deprivation. Often, the inherent pain suffered by an active user, before recovery, exceeds that of the average person’s worst nightmare. Complimenting the overarching theme of hopelessness and despair, one common thread in the active user’s story is that of isolation and pervasive loneliness. More often than not, the turning point in numerous stories of addiction is when the substance enthusiast morphs into the solitary pill popper, drunk, drug abuser, or addict.

Why sober community

 Combatting isolation is a driving force for the creation of sober living/sober houses.  These homes often place emphasis on promoting spiritually, physically, and emotionally progress in sober surroundings as a crucial component of successful long-term recovery. The first safeguard against relapse, as is often underlined in the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, is the openness and willingness to reach out to others in recovery and expand a network of sober support that alleviates isolation and accentuates a sense of camaraderie in the battle against addiction. Living in a sober house, or at the very least living with a sober roommate or roommates, makes this extremely accessible, as finding sober entertainment, sober events, and sober jobs becomes about as painless and effortless to find as substances, confusion, and chaos once were to the standard addict.

What happens in a sober home or sober living

Experiences as insignificant as casually sharing past histories of use, talking about the struggles of sober dating, or simply distracting one another from the periodically overwhelming fixation of chemical dependence for spiritual maladies are just a few of the many blessings and advantages of living in a setting of fellow sober minded people.

My experience at Tharros in Lexington MA

In my personal experience, within weeks of entering Tharros House, I recognized the magnitude and significance by which having a fellowship of sober friends provides the definitively lonesome subconscious of my addict mind, a sense of immense spiritual and social relief. As time progressed, the bonds of the men in the house grew, cultivating a sense of wholeness, and an irreproachably guilt and shame free elevation of my self-esteem. The house morning meetings, ping pong tournaments, the bi-weekly bowling gatherings, the Sunday night dinners all constructively snowballed, compounding a positive growth in my confidence, and belief in my peers. It re-instilled a conviction in me that I was worthy of maintaining positive connections, of having faith in those who I entrusted to support me, of finding socially, intellectually, and intangibly meaningful and liberating connections, but most importantly of enjoying the basic elements of life all entirely substance free. Undoubtedly, the brotherhood of the men facing the struggles and triumphs of sobriety, living and breathing a substance free life together, fuses a comradeship that makes the strenuous days tolerable and the triumphant days euphoric. Thus, the urgency of placing the sober supports around oneself in the manner of a sober living environment is perhaps the single most critical key to my personal success in sobriety.
I was skeptical about sober living when it was suggested to me.  At Tharros, I found a wholesome and inclusive environment, and I’ve gained much more than I could have imagined.  To learn more about what we do at Tharros, click here to explore the Tharros experience.

Living Sober in Massachusetts

Living Sober in Massachusetts

The path to living sober can be much different for each individual person.  There’s no magic program or exercise – the best way to get sober and stay sober is to find your own path. There may be many similar ways of thinking as far as sobriety goes, however just because one program doesn’t work for you it doesn’t mean you’re doomed. That’s the best part about living in a sober house – you’re able to live with like-minded people and take your own path with the guidance of experienced mentors.

Sober Living Housing vs. Halfway Houses

Sober living, as opposed to a halfway house, is much more directed at people in recovery from addiction, as opposed to criminal activity or mental health. Halfway houses may carry a certain stigma about them, whereas sober houses are generally looked at in a different light.

If you’re looking for the support to solidify your foundation of living sober, you’re much better off finding recovery housing that identifies itself with sober living due to the differences in amenities, programs, structure, and support.

First Step: Getting Clean

Abstaining from drugs and alcohol is just the beginning step on the road to recovery.  It’s hugely important, as it’s hard to think clearly and face your feelings / issues while under the influence. You may feel like you’re going in the right direction if you’re going to meetings high, but it’s very unlikely that you will have any success.

Get Moving

Many times when people put down the substances that they have depended on, they feel stuck. Feelings may come up that you haven’t felt in a while due to the constant suppression – perhaps feelings that there is something wrong with you or that you aren’t good enough. Challenging and ultimately changing those beliefs is critical for recovery.

Path to Living Sober

Getting and staying sober is rarely achieved when done alone. Having the support of family, friends, and people that understand exactly what you are going through is critical.

At Tharros House Structured Sober Living in Massachusetts, clients have the best success when they are exposed to many ideas and given the power to choose their own path to recovery.  I believe that you need to identify what is meaningful for you in order to direct your own recovery.  To learn more about this approach, please visit www.TharrosHouse.com

Living a Sober Life in Massachusetts

A Sober Life Can Be A Very Happy Life

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Living a Sober Life is not a death sentence

I hear many newcomers to sobriety express fears that living a sober life means that the fun and joy in their lives is now going to become a thing of the past.  While most will quickly admit that the “fun” was short lived, soon leading to some brand of misery, it’s not uncommon to feel like we’re going to lose much of what we termed “fun” in early sobriety.  In my experience, and for most who I’ve seen embrace recovery, life just started to get fun when I found my path to recovery.

In the past week, clients of our Sober Living in Lexington MA, Tharros House, have been rock climbing, hiking in the blue mountains, bowling, grilling some great steaks and seafood, learning to cook their own pizza’s, and much more.  But it’s not just the activity that is the fun, it’s the community and fellowship that is often at the center of a good time in sobriety.  Imagine that you get to have fun feeling completely comfortable and accepted for who you are, without having to adjust your mood or behavior with a substance!

Sober Events

I recently heard someone who was having great difficulty with the idea that they would get married one day and that they would not be able to participate in their own wedding reception.  What a reminder this was to me about the fears that my life was going to slip away while I changed into a boring, sober man.  Nothing could have been further from the truth!  Attending and hosting events, parties, and dinners is not a thing of the past.  You get to choose what you want in your sober life.  You are the designer of your life, and in my experience, what I found that I enjoyed wasn’t what I had been doing for so many years!  An event like a wedding can seem like it will be very different without the champagne toast; it is different: you find a different glass to use for the toast, and you gain the ability to engage with others, remember your conversations, and act the way you want to act.  Imagine waking up the day after your wedding and being able to hold your head high when seeing your guests at breakfast or brunch!

Sober and Single

Another common fear that I hear is regarding relationships.  So many of us used substances to help reduce the anxiety around our relationships.  I’ve been asked: How can I date someone if I’m sober?  The secret for me was first learning to become comfortable with who I am.  Dating, while often desired in early recovery, is usually best approached after some period of real recovery foundation.  I’ve seen many people with 6 months to a year of sobriety engage in successful relationships which offered them more than they ever thought possible.  The first several months in recovery are often an opportunity to learn more about who we really are.  With those who have taken the opportunity to be single while living sober for the first year, I’ve seen the best relationships show up.  In my experience, relationships got far better in sobriety.  Women respected me more when I had learned about myself and committed to my sober lifestyle.

Sober Recovery

Whatever your fears about a sober life, remember that the process of recovery is much more than learning how to live substance free.  Recovery is an awakening to who you are.  You get to live a life you design and while changing beliefs and behaviors isn’t easy, the rewards are far greater than I imagined they could be.

If you’re curious about the kinds of activities that you might be interested in doing when living a sober life, we suggest taking a look at Phoenix Multisport, a great organization for those choosing a sober lifestyle.   See what’s happening with Phoenix in  the Boston area here: http://www.phoenixmultisport.org/index.php?&chapter_id=57

Person That is Sober Living in Boston Massachusetts

Sober Living in Massachusetts

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So you’ve decided to get sober and now you’re hearing the term “ Sober Living ”. Maybe you’re in a treatment center or detox facility. Maybe a friend or family member is suggesting sober housing as an alternative to living at home. So what is it like? This is my story about how living in a sober house changed my life.
In 2007, I decided that my life had become unmanageable and that I didn’t want to continue living the way I had been. Everything about my life had become centered on the next drink and drug. I had designed my career to accommodate my addiction, and all of the things that were important to me fell short of booze on my priority list. After entering treatment, I began to hear about “Aftercare” and “Continuing Care”. These were terms for the work that I would continue to do in order to maintain my sobriety, after treatment ended. This is where I first heard of living in a sober home.

Living a Sober Life on My Own

After deciding that I was fully capable of maintaining my own sobriety without someone else “controlling my life”, I decided against a sobriety house, and chose to move in with friends from my treatment center instead. While my intentions were sincere, my conviction to stay the sober path was soon challenged.

I was faced with many temptations, intense emotions, and unanticipated life struggles. What I had imagined to be an easy path to walk in my newfound sobriety became a dangerous tip toe through a wild jungle. Before the end of 8 months, I had relapsed, and things got bad… fast!

I had heard that when you drink again, you “pick up where you left off”. This was certainly the case for me as I found myself ready to leap from the 17th floor of my apartment building- only a higher power could have kept me alive through the events to follow. It took me more than a year to get back into treatment.

Getting Sober Again

Returning to treatment in 2009, I vowed to do things differently. I spent 90 days in residential treatment and decided to move close to my treatment center in Los Angeles, where I had begun to build a sober community and fellowship. As I approached the end of treatment, a sober home was suggested for me. But again, I was reluctant to give up control and live with strangers. Besides, I had heard that sometimes people actually used in sober livings!

I would move out into my own home, but near my community, I decided. Within six months, I found myself back in crisis, lost in desperation, and far from the sober way I had envisioned.
After completing a 3rd visit to residential treatment, I was beaten. I knew then that my decisions were not serving me. I decided to trust others, and I accepted that an aftercare plan may need to include this off-putting concept: living in a sober house.

The Reality of Sober Living

I arrived at my new sober living house in September of 2010. I quickly discovered that my mind’s concept of a controlling environment with supervision and strict management was very different from what I entered into that day. I wasn’t supervised, I was supported. I wasn’t controlled, I was given suggestion. When I made a choice, it was my choice, and what I learned in the following months taught me how to make good choices for myself. My house manager, Joe, told me “I can’t get sober for you dude. This is your journey… I’m just here to help you find your way”. Joe would quickly become a mentor and friend, offering much needed advice about everything from work to women. I made many friends that year, some who are still close to me today. I thought I would be giving up my free will… instead, I was learning how to reclaim it.

Tharros House

Fast forward to 2016 where I now sit, writing this blog in the office of Tharros House, my own High Standards Structured Sober Living home in Lexington Massachusetts. With 8 current clients who are learning to walk a great path, all desiring a different life than they are leaving behind, I am struck by how different I thought it would be those years ago when I entered Joe’s house in Los Angeles. I experienced many new things through the people I met and the opportunities I was afforded in sobriety. I found a way to live life that is far happier than I ever had before the drinking or drugs began.

I am now grateful for my addiction! Without it, I wouldn’t have the life I have today, nor would I have learned how to live the way I do now, with great meaning and joy. At Tharros House, my team and I work with only 10 clients at a time to ensure that we provide the support and suggestion that can help each individual design their own successful recovery. Each client at Tharros House learns to apply the tools from treatment in a way that is both fun and effective. Clients participate in sober events and learn to have fun while living sober in the city of Boston. Our team is here to help each person find their way.
Learn more about what a sober living home can offer for you. You deserve a joyous and meaningful life, and the right support and guidance can help you find your way. Visit us at www.TharrosHouse.com to learn more about Tharros House in Lexington, MA.